August 9th, 2002 - "bored"

so yesterday was very successful. shopping was fabulous..a little lia and a little tweth and a little independence mall. last nite sucked however. you know, i have a problem turning my hurt into anger, and when i go to say what i want to say to the person or persons in this situation that hurt me, i feel backed into a corner. jeni sounded like she had no idea what she was talking about last nite and all i wanted to do was walk away. i often wonder why eddie couldnt have waited till i left to fuck things up. how did i get slowly phased out of the group that i created? anyway..so now there will be even more trouble because apparently briana told tim slyvia that we were stuipid because we say shit but we will never do anything. good job briana, cuz now jeni and laura wanna do something to prove you wrong. oops i did it again. well i hope everyone is happy with who they are friends with now, and real comfortable in chosing that. i wonder why my "close" friends would actually enjoy hanging out with someone that would hurt me so bad...hey whatev. i am leaving in 3 weeks..no one call me...ok maybe a couple of you. the rest of you can have fun hanging with the new crew..you know who you are....blah blah i am at work. renee...what the hell were you thinking..a fuck ass? fords suck first of all...fuckasses are the worst! i went to hot topic yesterday and got some arm bands because they said sum 41 and afi..perfect for warped tour..which also means i hafta remind jeni and make sure she gets the tickets today. me, jeni, joe, lil ham, and maybe davey k...i bought a fan for the occasion..an around the neck fan..word. tonite...dont know what i am doing..maybe going to the powerlines if i find nothing better to do...then sleeping at jeni's..then tomorrow i hafta attend yet another drink and crash party...ec's going away party..whoop whoop. i will miss that little ec. hey jen's play is amazing..everyone go see it in orleans..its over te 15th so get going. i wonder what happened to jen last nite..i wish my car had an oil change..but some fuckers promise things and never do them because they are too busy hanging out in the mall parking lot smoking ciggarettes..there's a winner. man...i wonder what it will be like..i dont wanna leave...i am losing control..LoL...shiznit..i am coming back to tech you motherfuckers..people need to be kept in line...and now since i have graduated shit has hittith the fan. faaak that. ok well i am gonna go check email that i dont have.