August 10th, 2002 - "it's too quiet"

i am so fucking tired i am contemplating killing mylsef at this point. i must say..i really have throurougly enjoyed the weather the past few days..it has been phabulous. i thought i smelled gas coming from jeni's living room, so i thought i should check on her sister jordan...who was oddly enough standing behind a rocking chair in the corner of the room, and when i walked in she was mischeiviously smiling at me..weird. there are kittens running rampid around the house, they are freaking out. they are really cute. yes erin, cuter than a puppy. so the powerlines were really boring last nite...which is the strangest fucking thing ever because people are always there and always having fun...i guess it just wasnt meant to be..i'm down..whatev. oh my god...jordan just climbed under the table..found a knife in the dishwasher and just stabbed this big inflatable ball..you know..the ones you cant refill. no she is sad and trying to blow it back up, which i told her cannot in fact happen. AND she just ripped it in half now out of frustration and yet continues to try and blo it up. what the hell am i doing here?! i cant handle this..LoL fuckn=in kids. now she is stepping on it..haha. i hung out with jordan rutherford yesterday..that kid is awesome, but unfortunately i bored him half to death. however i did get my oil changed. lindsay flipped on dubbs last nite..he knows he is not supposed to drink because of his seisures..he was really upset. but come one..he is 24, he should know right from wrong by now..especially when it concerns his health. i wanna get back to bed but jordan won't sit her little ass in the bed and watch tv anymore. smores for breakfast, what a good babysitter. oh shit...jordan is pissed. uh yah..so i wish blakey would wake up and watch this little monkey. or someone should come over and keep me company. casey is later...but thats like way later. no one is up now anyway..how unfortunate. well i am gonna go..talking to dan diehl..uh yah..peace.